Sunday, March 21, 2010


On the IPOD "Need You Now" by: Lady Antebellium

This weekend has brought on all kinds of questions regarding forgiveness... My dad was always a strong believer in "forgive but don't forget" and he wasn't quite as big on the notion of asking for forgiveness. My Mom is very good at asking for and giving forgiveness and of course taught us how to apologize and how to accept it at a very young age. As kids we were always kind of split on the matter: Adam and I probably forgive the easiest, Andrew finds it harder and the three of us as a whole are probably all resistant to asking for it.

I guess the reason I bring it up is because I'm wondering:

Does forgiving and being forgiven change your body image?

Let me explain a little bit...I am not referring to a higher power kind of forgiveness. I'm talking about a face to face, person to person, heart to heart kind of forgiveness.

Over the last 31 years I have collected a ridiculous amount of baggage. I'm right on the edge of being real sick of carrying it around. I feel like it's digging in to my back and if I get myself really worked up about it I feel like I can't breathe...

Giving forgiveness seems like the easy part because it's on my terms. I can most likely forgive on the surface, but I'm really talking about forgiving from your core. Actually finding a way to let it go and not hold on to even the smallest thread. Don't worry I'm not saying I won't remember it. It has changed me, that I can't deny but I'm just tired of carrying it all.

Asking for forgiveness is harder...First of all you have to admit you're wrong...can you admit that parts of it were wrong??? No, not really I think you have to honestly take full blame...

I guess the question is, what happens if you are not forgiven? I have always heard that you ask for forgiveness three times and if on the third time you are not forgiven then it is on them.

Do you need forgiveness to move past a mistake or is asking for it enough?

I really don't know the answer to this. And I can't really tell you yet if this is really the key to letting your baggage go. But I do know that my baggage does relate to my weight. And I know that it's holding me back. And I know that I play a part in all of it. And I know that I want to fix it however I can.

By the way, I'm completely aware that this is not an overnight fix.

Menu for Monday:

Turkey Meatballs with Fresh Marinara
Sauteed Spinach and Wild Mushrooms
Greek Chicken Skewers
Spinach Salad with hearts of palm, mandarin oranges, toasted almonds, and avocado
Miso Glazed Salmon
Broccoli Lo Mein
Low Fat Brownies
Chicken Drummettes
Vegetable Baked Ziti

xoxo chef a

1 comment:

sharyn said...

Yes you were right, very, very deep.
Did you know that Every time we forgive, we open up the gates of forgiveness in the world, and we are the first ones to walk through?
So if you are seeing changes, it must mean you have learned how to do something you may have not been able to do before, even though you may have though you could. These feelings of positiveness weather through weight loss, the gift of pregnancy(some time in the future) or positive relationships, can be seen as the results of your actions being realized. You must be waking through through first:)
Make sense?